He was a ghost.

 

Being completely drenched the last thing I want is to have to answer your question, but I know if I don’t you’ll follow me till I give it up because you’re just like that.

“Jordan, on one hand, I can count how many times you haven’t let me down.On my whole body, I can count how many times you’ve let me down”

I watch as he flinches and wants to leave because this conversation has taken a twist and these are not the words he wants to hear.

“I want to believe so badly that you’re different Jordan.That this time round you’ve got your shit sorted out and that we can for once have a conversation where the word okay isn’t a full sentence.”

He shuffles closer towards me, and his shadow grows larger casting over me reminding me that this isn’t going to work for me.

“Wouldn’t it be perfect for you if I could forget about how you left me in that mental cage and watched me dwindle away like I was nothing?” I say as I watch him step back.

I lean for the garage door because it had become clear distance was needed between us.

“Something’s got to give Anna.” he smirks off so cooly

“That’s what you’re always sayin! So tell me what have I got to do? What must I give? I ask him defensively.

“What other pieces of me must I let go for your sake to feel better, Jordan?” i find myself pounding away at his indifferent heart.

“I’m just an echo of who I was! Nothing more than a mirage of trying so hard and failing to grasp onto a forgotten being! Who am I tell me Jordan?!” my eyes are gleamed with tears as his are clear and crisp with no connection to any words I mention.

“So what other pieces of me do you want Jordan?” I ask blankly as the night rolls by with the simplest ease. I watch Jordan turn and walk off in silence just as he arrived.

He asked an unbearable question and yet couldn’t handle the answer and left like a ghost. He was always a ghost in my life

 

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